Our dog just died

Our dog just died............ huhuhu
sad sad sad.....sniff sniff sniff

How come there's no vet here in my town? haist!

Untitled

I think I'm upset. I just don't really know yet why. Sigh
Or is it just me? Sigh
Life's crazy

Family Outing

I'm a certified Family Outing fan/ addict.

I miss clumsy Chunhee. =(

Dae-sung is really really cute. 0.0v

Jae-suk is the funniest and absolutely the best Korean MC! ^^

and the rest of them are all hilarious!


p.s
thanks to ~ ramensoupsubs!~ for posting the vids. kudos!

Disappointments come from people.

Joyce Meyer said that most of our disappointments come from people. I never really thought about this but immediately after she said this, I was caught, and I told myself. Oh, boy, yes it's true!

She said that 'if we expect on people, we are setting our foot on being disappointed'.

Of course circumstances get us frustrated and downhearted but looking at it deeply, it's true that most of our disappointments come from people.

Just come to think of this,

* You wake up hungry one particular morning. You're used to eating breakfast by 8:00 AM, but nobody knows why there's NO breakfast on this particular day. You're mom is nowhere to be found and you start gnashing your teeth, wondering where your MOM is and why she didn't prepare your breakfast. See, there's disappointment and frustration.

* Anniversary. You expect your husband to do something grand or at least get you a movie ticket or reservation to your favorite restaurant, however when he comes home, just when you thought he will surprise you, you were the one who got totally surprised because he came home empty handed and completely clueless about your anniversary. Disappoinment.

I've just come to realize that most of my frustrations when I was still living with mom was because of my high expectations towards her. I drew a picture of a great mother in my mind, and just because she didn't meet my expectations, I was always angry at her and thought that she wasn't good. But now, I've realized I was so wrong. My mom is a great woman. She has imperfections of course, but she is always kind and understanding. She had her shortcomings but she's always been devoted to our family. Our opinions and perspectives may be world's apart but she is after all my mother. I am her daughter and it is just right that I take my part in understanding and loving her for whoever she is.

Way back into love

I have been dealing with lots of things since I started working homebased. There's mom who's always nagging, dad who's a little untidy, brother who's lazy, bf who's million miles away, internet that's very often intermittent, brownouts, hot weather, no social life, church that's 3 hours away, can't go to my favorite restaurants in the city, can't even get a Starbucks coffee, students who are freaking annoying at times. I swear I can go on and on and on. I've got so many things going on that's been driving me insane. I've been whining about every single matter. And I thought....' God, I'm tired. ' 'What happened to the things you taught me.' 'Where's all the joy and patience and kindness and gentleness and love and self-control that I used to have?' I'm tired. And the Holy Spirit spoke to me and said, 'well, you still have all those things. It's the way you see things; and the way you're seeing your situation is way low. Where you are right now is exactly where God wants you to be. It's your training ground.'

Thanks to my daily dose of Joyce Meyer.

Glory to God who never gets tired of me and never fails to remind me of my purpose; who constantly loves me unconditionally despite of who I am and what I've done.

I'm half way back to my real self and I'm glad.

Glory to God in the Highest!

"what you pray for reveals your heart"

Joyce Meyer has always been one of my favorite preachers eversince. I used to watch her in RPN channel 9 every 9:30 AM. ( I'm not sure if it's still in the same channel and time now). For me, she is one of the most excellent preachers when it comes to teaching Christian life. She has a very good way of combining boldness and humor in teaching Christian living which will really make you want to meditate on the word of God, introspect and check your lifestyle as a Christian. However, I discontinued listening to her daily broadcast for quite sometime because I've begun to fall in love with Pastor Joel Osteen (ministry ) who is equally a great speaker.

Couple days ago, I thought of listening to Joyce Meyer's broadcast again through live video streaming online. And again, I am so amazed of the rich contents of her sermon plus her ever splendid style of preaching the gospel.

After I listened to the second part of her sermon this evening, " Character traits of an excellent man" , here's one point that caught me.

"what you pray for reveals your heart"

Listen to you heart and you will know more about yourself. Look at the prayers of Paul and Jesus. ( Ephesian 3:16- 19, Philippians 3:10, Philippians 1:9-11, Matthew 5:44 Colossians 1:9- 12, Matthew 26:41)

Tonight before we all go to bed, let's check on what's in our prayer list.

Is it mostly material? Is it all about ourselves? Is it all about the world? Is it all about getting ahead?

But this is Paul's prayer ' and it is my prayer, that your love may abound more and more...that I may be pure and blameless...filled with fruit of righteosness that comes through Jesus Christ.'

To God be the glory! Amen!

Creamy Macaroni Soup and Ube-macapuno from Red Ribbon

I've got a nasty cold. Ugh! I hate it. I don't remember the last time I had a cold so this thing is unusual to me and it makes me feel so sick. hehe! like a child..Anyways, it also makes me miss bf. If he were here, I'm sure he'd buy me my favorite Ube-macapuno cake from Red Ribbon and Creamy Macaroni soup from Jollibee.

I miss Sunday School

Part of my ministry in the church was teaching Sunday School Children. I love children and I love the fact that I am one of those people who share the gospel to those innocent minds. In a way, I am molding them to become Christ-like. Apparently, I had no choice but to stop teaching them when I decided to work homebased.

Anyway, this video was taken in Chungju, South Korea. I taught the Sunday School kids there a few songs when I visited their church.

P.S it's my voice in the background, so please just smile and never mind the fact that I am one and a half notes short.

You'll never really know what will happen next.

You don't really know what will happen next.

I learned today that a couple who's been friends with J and I for quite a long while had to put off their supposedly January wedding because the guy's parents suddenly had a change of heart... Can you imagine that? They've been together for 7 or 8 years. The guy's parents have always loved her like a daughter -in- law even without the wedding yet.....and then just because she had said ' something' that his parents didn't like, they just stopped ' liking/ loving ' her?! eh? in the middle of all the wedding preparations?! they just blew away 7 years and everything they knew about her are just 'changed'?! I really wonder what 'words' could possible change their thinking about her. What kind of 'words' could possibly make them call off the wedding. Sigh

My new hobby~

I have a new hobby.
Guess what?! ......................................................................................
D R A W I N G.

Yes! Drawing! Who would have thought I'd be interested in drawing? hehe! I'm not very good at it but I'm enjoying it, right now. Anyway, I know that this is just for a while.

Actually, cooking is my real first love. Sadly, I can't cook now as much as I did when I was in the city, 'coz a lot of ingredients aren't available in the local market. It's so frustrating. So instead of being crabby, I've decided to diverge my attention into something really new, that is drawing. I'm lovin' it. =)

My Church in Antipolo

I was really excited to go to church this morning and thank God 'coz my hunger and thirst for worship was quenched. My mother church is 3 hours away from home and it's really expensive and inconvenient to go there every Sunday as much as I want to. It is a missionary church which is located in a poor area somewhere in Antipolo. People there are way generous, warm and kind. I love that place so much although I've broken maybe 5 pairs of shoes (heels and trainers) in a year because the road is muddy and rocky. =(

The moment I arrived at the church, children welcomed me warmly. " teacher rayanne!!!" They kept on hugging me and kissing me. awww...children...I love them. They can turn my gray sky into blue. They can fly me over to the moon. I'm just happy that they haven't forgotten me. I used to teach Sunday School Children and Young People a year and a half ago and I started being a mushroom church member in January when I began working homebased. I missed them a lot.

Anyways, I felt home even for few hours. I had so much laughter, anointing and grace. It's really different when you're attending worship in your mother church.

My pastor was so glad that I visited so he prepared a little lunch fellowship for us which he doesn't normally do on Sundays since the church's budget is kind of tight. My pastor must've really love me as a member.

Have a blessed Sunday everyone! oops! Should I say 'have a great week everyone!' hehe!

Bad Day

A lot of things happened today. Not so significant but, ugh!

One. I got up at 5, as usual, and I was really thirsty! What's up with the muggy weather lately? Few days back I was already feelin' the chilling breeze of Christmas, but for the past 3 days, it's sweltering again. Well, I've no control over it so smile girl! =)

Two. I went on with my classes and one student who's been constantly bugging me for quite sometime now, again, infuriated me. Argh! Okay, that's the second. I'm not going to talk about the reason why.

Third. Brownout! They're fixing the electric lines again so electric power was off for around 5 hours. Thank God! coz last time was for 12 hours. -.- Whew! Breath...relax..smile! There was nothing to do so I decided to cook tuna penne. The taste was fantastic! Of course I cooked it. wahaha! (gloating)

Fourth. There goes my mom..again and again and again.....ughhh!!! zip your mouth now.

Fifth. My knight in shining armor to save the day. =) Thank God I have someone like him. Always present. Always on time. Always handsome. Always loving. Always caring. Always capable of taming the monster in me when it's about to arise.

'FILIPINOS' chocolate bar

Why not diba..I wonder if it's masarap. hehe

My FARM

okay! so here's my 'own farm' and I so love it. =)

You can see that I put lots of white roses and tulips because they're my favorites. I'd like to add some more decorations and architectural style ( naks! ) but like I said, I'm not very creative so perhaps next time. The most essential part of my farm is the line JESUS SAVES. Actually,I first wrote, I HEART JESUS. But then I thought, so? okay I love Jesus but then what? I'm not proclaiming the message of the gospel in that case I guess. So, it's now Jesus Saves, after all that's what I really meant to say. Surprisingly, I've been getting messages saying that my farm is beautiful. Hmmm.. I think that it's not compare to other's farm, but what makes it 'extra' beautiful is the name Jesus on it. Glory to God!!! =)

Farmtown

Here's a picture of SuzieQ's farm which i thought is simply amazing! I 've been playing FT for almost a month now and I've been thinking of how I can declare my faith through my farm like this. Unfortunately, I've been really tied up lately, I couldn't decorate my farm nicely. I have 639, 053 coins and I'm at level 27 which means I can buy many stuff to put in my farm but I need a lot of time to do that.

Anyway, the point of this post, is that I admire SuzieQ for her way of telling the world about Jesus. I'm sure God is smiling on her because she's not only playing, she's also evangelizing. Good joob Suzie!

Unredeemed

The rain suddenly poured like crazy and I felt really gloomy and melancholic. I thought that it would be nice to catch up on my reading. Apparently, the electric current in my small town was cut and of course it would be hard to read with candles. So I just sat on my favorite couch and inhaled the sound of the pouring rain and sentimental darkness, with a bit of a drama from my mom and dad arguing hard about something I thought was really petty. After about 20 minutes, thank God! electricity's back!

I turned my computer on and checked some of my favorite sites. God landed me on this beautiful song and I was really blessed and moved to tears. This song has the exact words I hoped to hear this time. You can listen to it here:

GOD IS INDESCRIBABLY AMAZING, indeed.

The cruelest world

The coldest heart

The deepest wound

The endless dark

The lonely ache

The burning tears

The bitter nights

The wasted years
Life breaks and falls apart

But we know these are

Places where grace is soon to be so amazingI

t may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But when anything that’s shattered is laid before the lord

Just watch and see

It will not be unredeemed
For every choice that led to shame

And all the love that never came

For every vow that someone broke

And every lie that gave up hope

We live in the shadow of the fall

But the cross says these are all

Places where grace is soon to be so amazing

It may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But when anything that’s shattered is laid before the lord

Just watch and see

It will not be unredeemed
Places where grace is soon to be so amazing

It may be unfulfilled

It may be unrestored

But you never know the miracle the father has in store

Just watch and see

It will not be

Just watch and see

It will not be unredeemed

Restoring relationships

I love what I'm feeling right now. I'm in a moment of pure bliss and genuine peace. It's real and I love it. It's always great to see relationships being restored, indeed.

Now, it's true that no matter how difficult it is to humble yourself and make peace with people whose relationship with you has been severed (whether they hurt you or you hurt them), when it's the right time, God is going to give you the strength and love you need to enable you to fix anything that has been broken be whole again. I thank God for moving and restoring my broken relationship with some people. I thank God because HE is indeed at work in my life and He's doing such a masterpiece. I thank God for all these wonderful changes He's bringing in me and in my life. I thank God for all the happiness I've got. Glory to GOD in the highest! Halleluiah!

Forgiveness

A former colleague greeted me so casually this morning through yahoo messenger. It was a bit of a surprise since we haven’t really talked in a long time. You know that thing called “grupo” (group). She wasn’t part of my circle of friends in the office, so was I to hers. We didn’t have bad blood towards each other but we weren’t that close too. I know there were some things that my circle of friends didn’t like about her and her friends, and I’m pretty sure that her peers were also saying something about us. It’s the usual thing. Which I hate. What really surprised me was that she asked for my forgiveness. I was like…stun…” ???” why?

I asked her what is it that she’s asking for forgiveness and she said that in the past, she said bad things about me to other colleagues which were actually… wrong? misconception? misunderstanding? I told her that it’s nothing to me and that I don’t even have any kind of bitterness to anyone. I also said I’m sorry if ever there were times I “ unconsciously” offended her. Our conversation went on and on and it was really nice catching up to an old friend. I remember that she was one of those “first people” I met in the office. All the good memories came back to me and I remembered how close we were and how I didn’t notice I was drifting from that friendship.

Today I learned that
When someone said, “ it’s not what you think it is” , think it over…it may be true.
But don’t listen to everything that other people say. They may be lying.
And not because someone is loud means she’s a gossiper, likewise, not because she’s quiet means she’s kind and innocent.
Looks can be very deceiving.
Not everybody will celebrate your victory. Some will do their best to pull you down, so watch out!

I appreciate her humility to ask for my forgiveness although it wasn’t really necessary. After all, I didn't have any clue of what she did. She was really brave to confess that and I'm sure that it was her conscience, moreover God, telling him to do that.

Actually, I was the type of person who’s overly friendly, overly trusting, totally gullible and yeah, I was loud. HOwever, I can guarantee you that I don’t lie, and I don’t say nasty things to people behind their back. I just like talking to people and listening to their stories. I am happy when people achieve something. I am happy when people are in love. I am happy when people have any kind of good news. And I am also sad and affected, when people I know are sad and down. ( even if we're not close, or even if i don't know them personally). I like listening and talking about love and life. That's just me. I like talking and listening. But I was misinterpreted.

I learned my lessons the hard way.

Almost a year ago, I was betrayed and I was left in pain.

But after that, I thank God because I then realized who my real friends were and also, I learned when to shut my mouth. I may not have had any bad intentions about talking but like I said, I was misinterpreted. So it's better to talk less and get less mistakes! That makes a lot of sense!

I greatly love the fact now that I am working home based. This is my training ground- to make harmony with my mom and to use my tongue only for the glory of God.

This is my training ground and my sanctuary.

I know that this is exactly the place where God wants me to be. I’m in the right place at the right time.

Glory to God!

Isaiah 43:18-19

This morning I suddenly thought about my past that was like a horror. I immediately shook it off and prayed to God. And just seconds ago, I came across with this bible verse which I think are the exact words that God is speaking to me.

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past. See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in the wasteland.”

Isaiah 43:18-19

Amen!

Wednesday thoughts

I always try to wake up with a smile on my face to invite the good spirit and inhale a beautiful life. I believe that it will affect my whole day. Sadly, for the past few months, things have become so difficult and the more wholehearted I am in welcoming the good atmosphere, the more it gets surprisingly topsy turvy. Is it really the people around me that ruin my day? Or is it me that allows them to rob me of my joy? Is it the bad situation? Or is it just me taking things so seriously when I can just shake them off? Am I really trying to turn the tide? Or am I staying in a rut? Am I changing my tunes? Or am I just talking but not really doing my best to make things work better? Sigh.

Saving Grace

Night and day I seek Your face
Long for You in the secret place
All I want in this life
Is to truly know you more...
As the waters cover the sea,
So Your love covers me
Guiding me on,
Roads unkown
I trust in You alone

My Saving Grace
My endless love
Deeper and deeper I'm falling in love with You
My one desire
My only truth
Deeper and deeper I'm falling in love with you

I will rise on wings of eagles
Soaring high above all my fears
I rest in Your open arms of love

This is what I really want to tell God. I know he hears me.

Hypocrite

I really hate hypocrites! arggh!

How do I keep loving someone like a friend or family who's a hypocrite? haizt!

Pray! pray! pray!

-.-

Tempted

I woke up this morning feeling really good. I felt the anointing of the Holy Spirit like what I posted here several hours ago. I was singing hymns, reflecting on the word, doing my job and mingling well with family members. Sadly, after a few hours of this beautiful scenery, I was tested. I was tempted and I succumbed. Last time I was in this situation, I was caught off guard and I just found myself doing what I have been struggling to obliterate in my spiritual life. It is very heartbreaking when you know you’ve done something bad and you know that God’s watching and He’s more hurt than you are. I am still wavering in my own wilderness. One day I’m home, the next day I’m lost; it’s like this again and again. I know that God is always ready to forgive and that makes me feel worse. I want to finish this race triumphantly. I want to live my life in a way that’s pleasing to Him. I want to give glory to His name by living a good life. I hope that when people see me, even without reading the gospel of Jesus, they’d be amazed at how my life has changed, at how I was radically transformed. Regrettably, even the closest people in my life can’t see it. Even I can't be positive about it. Sad.
I am writing this to remind myself of what I’ve done today, how bad I was and how sorry I am. Today is the mark of the last time I will ever do it again. God forgive me. God help me. Holy Spirit please don’t allow me to go through that test again.

Amazed

"I can't believe the way Your love has got a hold on me
Each morning I wake to find You near
You lift me above my fears
And set my feet on solid ground
All of my days belong to You
And I breathe in Your breath of life that fills my heart
You are my all consuming fire
I stand here before You
In wide opened wonder
Amazed at the glory of You
The power of heaven revealing Your purpose in me
As I'm reaching for You"

I was listening to this song just a while ago and I felt so good, I can't even explain it. God's love is so great. Every now and then, when I look at my life back then, how undeserving I was, yet saved by God's amazing grace, I'm still overwhelmed and close to tears. I can't believe that I am loved unconditionally. I can't exchange the life and faith I have right now for anything else in this world. I am so blessed and it's all because of God's grace and goodness. Glory to God!

Really?

One of my students said that the last time he had a bad day was many years ago, and never again after that. Is it really possible not to have a bad day ever? I really want to know.

Three weeks ago he said that he's not a whiner and that a day would pass without any single complaint. Wow! Is he a saint? I'm not mocking him or anything, but I really really wonder if that's possible...

Free talking class gone bad

I was talking to a student who's been getting on my nerves for quite a while now. I always say I am someone who is frank, worse, sometimes brutally frank. I wasn't able to control myself today and I lashed him during our class due to something I just can't stand. I was happy I did that but after a while, I wish I didn't do that.

Mr K likes blabbering about his personal life and although I don't like it, I can't do anything about it because he enrolled for 3 days business class ( M-W-F) and 2 days free talking class ( T-Th). On Tuesday and Thursday he would talk about his family, job and trips abroad. Of courese I try to introduce new topics every now and then; but I guess some people are just really into talking about themselves. It must be easier for them to divulge their life styles since we don't personally know each other.

What I didn't like today was his story of promiscuity. He told me about his vacation trips in Shanghai, Bangkok and his constant visit to red-light districts in Seoul. NO woman would want to listen to a man talk about his cheating or two-timing. I digressed but he continued with his crappy story. And then, with that serious tone of my voice, I said, " Mr K! You have a daughter right? In the future, she'll probably experience a lot of heartbreaks. Perhaps men will not take her seriously, cheat on her, make her cry; leave her miserable and devastated. And the reason is because you're sowing a seed of immorality so more likely, she'll reap it in the future". He was so surprised when I said that so he lashed back and said, "do you have a boyfriend? maybe he's doing the same thing". Whoa!!! I should have just kept quiet. Arrggh!!!

Anyway, I don't trust anyone but God. I know my boyfriend very well and by any measure he's the most beautiful person I 've ever met and I don't need to doubt him or anything.

Sigh. Next time he'd talk about "that" I hope to have the courage to talk about God and not be judgmental.

I want to listen

How many people are feeling lonely tonight? How many of them are weeping?
I'm sure there are a lot of people out there who are lonelier than I am tonight. I know there are millions of them whose problems, dilemma, burden, and sufferings are worse than mine. I want to talk to anyone among them and know why they are crying. Although I may not know them personally, I want to be a friend to them and let them know that there is someone in this world who's willing to listen to their pain. I want them to know that someone out here wants to give them a warm hug and let them know that God loves them despite and in spite of everything bad going on. I am here. I am sad too. But I want to listen...

Spell u-n-h-a-p-p-y

I am harboring unhappiness. I keep on trying to shake it off but it keeps on haunting me. I am in the state of uncertainty and I am losing; and every bit of it leaves me scarred. Today was another lonesome day and I am about to cry.
Lord, I need you so bad.

I'm not going to have a critical spirit

Today's word from Pastor Joel Osteen is about not having a critical spirit. He said that sometimes it doesn't really matter what's right or wrong. What matters is our relationship with people. I know that I am often very critical; not to others but to my family members, especially my mom. I always emphasize what is right, because I believe that doing the right thing is always right, of course it is. As a result, my mom and I always collide. Although I've known this long enough, I guess it is only today that it finally sank in me. My ears heard it and my heart wants to respond to that call. We can't always be right. My mom can't always be right. I can't always be right. We are all bound to make mistakes and that's because we're human. So I've decided, I'm not going to have a critical, fault-finding spirit. Like what pastor Joel said, I've been forgiven much (by GOD) so I'm going to love much.

God be with me!

Glory to God!

Psalms 14:1

The fool says in his heart, "There is no God." They are corrupt, their deeds are vile;

there is no one who does good.

Psalms 14:1

a sweet story ( from the book Become a Better You)

I just want to share a nice story from the book Become a Better You by Joel Osteen.

Christine was driving through an intersection when she accidentally turned too sharply and sideswiped another car. Worse yet, she was driving her brand-new car, a wedding gift from her husband Eric. Christine pulled over to the side of the road and the driver of the other car, an older gentleman, got out of his car and began to examine his severely damaged front bumper. He then stepped over to where Christine was sitting in her car, crying.

" Are you okay young lady?" he asked kindly.
" I'm fine," Christine sobbed, " but I just got married and my husband gave me this car as a wedding gift; he is going to be so upset. I don't know what I'm going to do."
" Oh, I'm sure it'll be okay." The older gentleman tried to console her. " Your husband will understand." They talked for a few minutes before he said, " If I could just get your insurance information, we'll exchange that, and be on our way."
" I don't even know if I have an insurance card," Christine said through her tears.
" Well it is usually in the glove compartment," the man suggested.
" Why don't you check there?"
Christine opened the glove compartment and found the owner's registration and the insurance information. Attached to the envelope containing the insurance card was a note that read, " Honey, just in case you ever have an accident, please remember I love you and not the car."

the more I try, the more I get hurt

I cannot change people. I cannot wait for them to change so that I'll be happy. I have to choose to be happy and adjust myself to them. So I have decided to change. But the more I try, the more I get hurt. Although I still find my mom's ways unacceptable, annoying and improper, I want to change. I want to go the extra mile. I want to reach out. I want to have a good relationship with her. I want to shut my mouth when I disagree. I want to pretend I didn’t see her off ways. I want to give compliments as often as I can. I want to show love all the time. After all, she is my mom. This is what I have to do. This is what I want to do. This is what God calls me to do. But the more I try, the more I get hurt.

No title

The most painful experiences I’ve had in life so far are those caused by my mom. I remember when I was in grade school; I was hotheaded and stubborn. But as I grew up and met a lot of people, and became a Christian, I was transformed. I believe. My siblings and I were close to my mom then. She was very patient, loving and really fun to be with. She was like a friend. I don’t know how and when things changed. I just know that right now, my mind is full of bad experiences with her. I am not proud of this but according to my mom, among my siblings, I am the worst child. I don’t know her categories for judging but I guess they’re: First of all, I am very open with my opinions; I mean if the food is salty, I say it’s salty. If the color of the curtain is awful, I say it. If the furniture is inappropriate, I say it. It’s not that I am being mean, I’m being honest. If something is good, I also say that it’s good. I tell her that she’s wrong if I think that she is. Everyone in the family would have the same stand most of the time, but I guess, I’m the only who didn’t learn the counter meaning of honesty or white lie. They are always mum, but I always stand my ground. I even argue with her if I have to. I hate this part of me and I swear I really want to learn to change the tunes. Secondly, I am very independent. I don’t like asking help from anyone as long as I can do it. My sisters would call my mom for some stuff they need. My brother would ask mom to prepare his food…stuff that children do... Me, although we have a helper, I wash my own clothes, I buy groceries and cook, and I clean the house. I find time to do them. And yet, she claims I am “pa-intindi”, dependent. How ironic! Lastly, I am the only Born Again Christian at home. My mom is a worker in the Catholic church. I know she feels ashamed that I am a convert now because other people are probably talking about it. But being a Christian is my joy. My life has never been this good and beautiful. My faith is the most important thing in my life and this is the best thing that’s ever happened to me. Other than these three, I don’t know why I am considered the black sheep. It’s really funny because at the church, office, or even overseas, I am well-loved. People think that I am a good person, faithful and sincere. Always smiling, always helping, and always thinking of others. How come my mom sees me differently? Sigh

Familia

I have been unhappy for quite a while now. I was doing okay working home based; having my own schedule, being able to save more money, getting along with my family, eating foods that aren’t from an eatery. You know the convenience of staying/ working at home. Everything was okay until I realized that my family isn’t as harmonious, cool and united as before. I have always thought that I have a great family; Not impeccable but great compare to other families. But not anymore I guess. I’m starting to lose that idea and I hate it. I remember when I was a kid, we used to go biking around the neighborhood, go jogging near Caliraya Lake and every holiday especially Christmas were well celebrated. I believe our neighbors envied us. We were like a model family. We were a picture of love, peace and happiness. Today, it's a picture of opinionated, independent, sometimes annoying and sometimes endearing grownups. Well, it’s not like I have a broken family now, but it’s not the same as it was. Anyways, every family has a flaw. Someone said, “Families are like fudge - mostly sweet with a few nuts”. ~ And so me, I won’t let this imperfection rob me of my joy. This is my home. This is what God gave me and I thank Him.

Love assumes the best

Love assumes the best

Love assumes the best Love…bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. 1 Corinthian 13:7 Love has no limits. Love never says, “You’ve gone too far. I can’t love you now." “All things” means everything is included. Christlike love leaves no doubt in the mind of another that you will continue to love steadfastly. Do those close to you know that they can fail and do foolish things, yet you will not falter in love for them? Are others assured that, even when they hurt you, you still love them, holding nothing against them? Love assumes the best about others. If someone inadvertently offends you, you choose to believe the offense was unintentional. If someone seeks to harm you, you “bear all things” forgiving unconditionally. If a positive light can shed on a difficult encounter, you grasp it. If someone continually provokes you, you “endure all things.” You never lose hope in the ones you love. You practice the same unconditional love towards others that Christ gives to you. It is easy to be a Christian but living a Christian life is another thing. It is our continuous struggle til we meet the Master. Let’s keep the fight and run the race. Be with me….

25 Random things I hope/ want/ dream

25 Random things I hope/ want

1. Get married with the person who will love me all his life: D
2. Attend a worship service in Lakewood Church
3. Travel around the world
4. Build an orphanage
5. Have a real ministry in the church
6. Go to Africa
7. Study Culinary
8. Watch a real heart or brain surgery
9. See an angel
10. Run a restaurant
11. Experience working in a wet market, farm or factory for a day
12. Talk to Pres. Obama
13. Act on stage or TV
14. Have a tree house
15. See heaven for a day ( and go back to Earth again)
16. Sleep in the most expensive hotel in the world
17. Take my family to exciting vacation spots
18. Serenade my fiancé
19. Learn how to play an instrument like piano
20. Get a very romantic marriage proposal
21. See “some people” radically change
22. Be an evangelist or missionary
23. Be fluent in Korean
24. Learn martial arts
25. Be one of the happiest woman in the world, be known for her passion in serving God and be the best daughter to her parents, wife to her husband, mother to her children…etc,:D

love is love...indeed

Couple years ago, I wrote in one of my blogs a very long love letter written by my sister’s ex- boyfriend. This letter dragged a lot of comments because the question was whether to take the guy back or not. Last 2007, this guy flew all the way from New Jersey to Philippines to propose marriage to my sister but was turned down since my sister was in a relationship and according to her, she had so much anger on him. (The letter below was written that time)

Few months later, my sister’s relationship with her present boyfriend became on the rocks. I don’t know exactly how things turned sour but for me, it was God moving. He heeded my prayers and the whole congregations’ as well. hehe! ( I really prayed so hard for my sister's love life) I’ve seen a lot of men visit my house, bring flowers, chocolates and stuff but none of them ever impressed me. I mean I didn’t see anyone good enough for her. ( feeling ko manager ako ng ate ko! haha) None of them deserved my sister. She hated me for intruding in her personal love life but I’m fine with that coz my intention was good and all I care was for her to be treated well. She has a very beautiful heart and she deserves to be treated like a princess. However, there was only one guy I thought was worth it to have my sister’s love, that's "the ex-bofriend" I'm talking about.

Later on, her relationship with the present guy got worse and worse and they finally broke up. A year later, this "ex-boyfriend" came again together with his parents and with a big and beautiful diamond ring with a dozen basket of red roses and asked for my sister’s hand. Finally, after 10 long years, they’re together again, and got a YES!
P. S.
They’re going to tie the knot next month in Michigan USA.

Here’s an excerpt of that very poignant love letter :

“they say that you regret the things you don't do more than the things you do. I don't want to regret not letting you know how i really feel. so this is why I'm emailing. I don't expect anything in return...all i ask is that u hear me out. I'm not expecting you to give me another chance...God knows...maybe i don't deserve one, but i am hoping for one...and if i am lucky enough to get that chance, i promise you that things would be different. i would NOT make the same mistakes i made. maybe all of this is too little too late...but i don't care. i guess i always thought that in the end, you would be there waiting for me, I'm sorry for being so unfair. love is love, whether it be right in front of you or thousands of miles away in different countries..and who you love, is who you love. you always knew this. i don't know why it took me so long to realize this, i don't know why i kept denying this. it has always been you. You have always been my love. i still look at all our old pictures...and the one that stands out the most is the one in Pansol..me sitting on that ugly blue carpet, and you sitting in that chair, with your arms around me....my Angel's embrace. I can still feel it. i can still feel your soft skin brushing against mine....I can still feel you.Love lead me your way once..... i can only pray it be so kind enough to lead me to you once again.

love is love...indeed

I hate the world today.

I hate the world today. I hate these kinds of days when I have a lot of unnecessary things in mind. Today is one of the days when I want to run to the church, break down and cry. I have been having sleepless nights and I wish I can just evaporate and be in another place at once. I hate the way things are right now. I hate that I am indecisive. I hate that I am stuck here. I hate that I feel hurt. I hate that I am confused. I hate that I am wavering.

Lord I know that you are with me. Please enlighten my mind and strengthen my faith. I am at lost in the midst of wilderness. I am hurt and I want to cry. I know that you hear me. In Jesus name I pray. Amen

Obedience + Waiting

TODAY'S WORD from Joel and Victoria
Did you know that when God spoke to Noah about building the ark, it had never even rained before? Can you imagine that? Noah knew people were going to make fun of him or call him crazy. I’m sure he had every opportunity to talk himself out of it. He could have come up with plenty of excuses. But Noah didn’t do that. He recognized that God had asked him to do a difficult thing, and he chose obedience. Noah didn’t run from the challenge; he chose to believe God. Noah’s obedience is what opened the door for God to supernaturally empower him to fulfill his destiny. Now he is one of the great heroes of faith.

My thoughts: Wow! when God spoke to Noah about building the ark, it had never even rained before, moreover, it took 120 years to see that prediction about the flood to happen. If I were Noah then, I probably would have grew cold in faith and just turned away. I can't imagine waiting for 120 years while other people are staring at me thinking, I'm crazy, just because I want to obey God. Anyway, I have now learned the meaning of obedience and waiting patiently. I have realised that waiting with a hopeful and prayerful heart means blessings. If waiting is a way to be obey God, then I want to obey God just like what I am doing now.

My sister and her stuff

I woke up this morning with the annoying complaint of my sister about my mom’s good intention.
Yes, good intention! A relative was here this morning asking for some amount of money from my mom because their electric bill was already overdue which means it’s going to be disconnected anytime today unless they pay immediately. My mom borrowed money from my sister and said that she’s going to give it to that relative to leave an image of generosity before she leaves for the US this Saturday. I don’t know why my sister resented that idea and complained to me with an indignant attitude. And I was just “-. - ok…”
Few minutes later when I got out of the room, I was stun. I thought I was in some kind of a garbage disposal unit or recycling factory with lots of things scattered. I mean, my sister’s stuffs are everywhere; luggage, shoes, clothes, cosmetics, bags, laptop, - gosh! They are everywhere in the living room! And first word I said was, “you mind fixing your stuff?” . And there comes another steaming discussion. My sister said, “I’m leaving in a week so I hope you’ll just leave them alone.” So now it should be okay that the house is very sloppy and messy because someone is going abroad? -. -;; Sadly, the sleeping monster in me suddenly emerged. I just can’t tolerate irrational thinking like that. (For me it is irrational) So I told her, “even if you’re leaving tomorrow, I’ll still tell you to fix your stuff and gather them in one place. If other people comes in, can we make an excuse that our house is unclean because you’re going to the states?” And then she started crying saying I’m a dictator and I always think I am right and perfect and that she’s not going to invite people anymore for her “despida”SIGH! And then she prepped herself and went out in anger hurriedly.

Was I wrong? Again, I guess I should've just kept quiet...

my most embarrassing moment LOL!

I wasn't able to send the money for my mom yesterday because the bank was already closed even before the time I had the time to go out. I decided to go back again today and also deposit my salary in my savings account (BDO).

I don't know how to write this story in a way that anyone who will read this will laugh because for me, this is my most embarrassing moment ever and I can't help but laugh at my stupid self.

My cousin's account is in Metrobank. It is very familiar to me because it is in the middle of the Mercury drug store where I always go and BPI where I withdraw money if the BDO ATM machine is out of order. It was almost 3pm and I was really hurried to get inside to avoid missing the chance to deposit the money. When I took the blue slip which is for depositing, I was surprised because there were 3 excess numbers in the account number that my cousin gave. I asked the guard if it was the right slip and he said " yes". He also told me to just ask the manager for assisstance since they can check her name in case something's wrong with the number. The manager kindly checked it but he couldn't find it too so he told me to call my cousin. I had to go out to buy e-load. kk! Because I rarely load up my cellphone. So I called my cousin and she said it's the right number. I went inside the bank for the second time and told the manager, " my cousin said this is the right number". Then the manager asked me, " what is her bank?" I confidently said " Metrobank!" The manager said, " Eh BPI to eh... " (This is BPI!!!") OMG! Guess you can imagine how I turned red and quickly melted and evaporated.

Moral lesson: Don't ever deposit money! hehe! or Don't ever go to the bank. hehe! LMAO

Me, my mom and our mouths

Here I go again writing about my mom. I think this blog is intended to write all my chagrin about my mom. What is wrong with her? Or What is wrong with me? A month ago, I told my mom that I’ll buy her an air ticket going to Singapore since it’s not very expensive. Also on my mind, I want her to experience travelling abroad since she’s getting older and she deserves to have some leisure too. Although I resent most of her actions, because they are most of the time proud, insensitive and out of this world) and dislike listening to her stories because I find them irrational and self-centered, I love her and I feel very bad about myself knowing I have this kind of thinking about her. I always feel guilty when it comes to her. I know that I should really just SHUT my mouth but I can’t help it. Her actions are way off. Anyway, to continue my story, my mom is now in her hometown because she has some problems with her NSO birth certificate. She needs to go to the municipal to have it fixed and have her middle name written on it. If you’re going to get a passport through agency, you’ll spend only 1,200 pesos or 750 if you will do it on your own in DFA. My mom had spent 2,000 pesos for the stuff she did today at the municipal, whatever that is. Naturally, anyone will ask, what did you pay for 2k php? And I see nothing wrong in that so I asked and then I suddenly dropped it and said, “oh I don’t really want to know I just ask, anyway...Unfortunately, to my mom it was a big deal. She lost it! She shouted at me over the phone saying, “I will show you all the receipts tomorrow” “you are always doubtful” “things are different now, everything is expensive” “you have a very bad mouth that’s why I don’t like talking to you” “shut up” and she kept on shouting things. And then I said I don’t like to fight and let’s end this call and so she dropped the phone. Sigh. Is my question really that bad? is it my way of asking? is it me? I was really shocked and I am in tears now because I don’t understand her and why these things are happening. I envy those people who have a good relationship with their mothers. I wish that my mom would at least, ONCE, listen to other people and know that she is not always right or maybe I should wish that my mouth will automatically stop saying a word when it’s about her, maybe then these kind of things will not happen again.

I love my mom and I want to honor her and obey her, so help me God.

Where does God want me to go?

Tomorrow is Sunday again and I don’t know which church I will go to again. I have been attending in a church nearby but I have to admit that I have never really felt blessed eversince I attended there. I do not blame the pastor or anyone in that church for I know that the problem is with me. I know that when we go to church, we are to focus on GOD not people. My mother church is in Antipolo which is 3 hours away from here. When I decided to work home based, I knew that I will have a problem commuting from here to my church. Anyway, I still chose to work here at home although I had an option then of staying near my church. I know that Sunday comes only once a week and it’s just right for me to give that time to God. Of course that’s what I want to do also, but imagine the time, the cost, and the energy I will be spending every Sunday. I know it’s worth it for there I find peace of mind, happiness and true of meaning worship. It’s my sanctuary. I want to go there every single day. I want to attend all services in my church like I used to; Bible study, cell group meetings, visitation, evangelization, dawn and evening prayer. I want to worship God with all my heart and soul. I want to serve God any way I can. I want to sing songs of praise for Him. I want to cry out to Him and surrender all my cares. I want to delight him with my humble heart and burning spirit that wants to love Him and know Him more. BUT…I am here. I am here. I don’t have what it takes to worship Him and serve Him there and it hurts me more than anything right now. How can I not afford to go there every Sunday? I know that God calls me to serve there but I have been so disobedient- because I have to wake up very early, because I have to take the jeepney ride, because I have to spend a lot for the transportation, because I will take the zigzag road for 6 hours back and forth while the worship service is for only 2 hours, because I’ve become complacent with the idea of simply going to church without really having the heart to worship. I wasn’t like this and I don't want to be like this anymore. I know that God is everywhere. I wonder where God wants me to go?

GOOD- night

My day almost ended awfully. I know that I am PMS-ing so my attitude is appalling plus the muggy weather aggravates things. I don’t like it that way but I can’t help it. I cannot explain how in the world my mood suddenly changed, but I thank God because after dinner, my spirit just turned up and I’m smiling again. Was it the " adobong kangkong with ground pork" that shake off my terrible mood? or the conversation with J? or the coffee? or the rain? or simply the Holy Spirit who used all those things to change the tunes and cheer me up? Anyhow, I'm glad I'm going to bed blithely and with a smile on my face.

Glory to God in the highest who makes His children joyful and takes away the pain!

Goodnight everyone! :D

I can't thank God enough

I’m so back in the Philippines and although I am again million miles away from J, I can’t be down because there’s something to look forward to. J and I had a very wonderful trip in Korea. I know that J loves me and is of proud me, but at the back of my mind, I still had some worries on how we will walk together in the crowd. I was really happy to be with J standing tall anywhere we went. He would always carry my stuff and hold my hand. He would let me take the cab first and would always ask if there’s anything I want. There was never a single second I felt awkward while meeting his family, friends or just being around with Koreans. His mom treated me well and I am so amazed to see how wonderful mother/ person she is. I can’t say anything bad about her. I totally salute her.
J is God’s gift to me. After I became a Christian, for 4 long years, I was just praying for the man of my dreams. It’s no surprise to know that J had been praying too then. When we met, we didn’t realize it would be the start of our story. We didn’t realize that God had started writing on His book a beautiful love story where we are the actors. God had made a wonderful way to connect two people who are literally million miles away from each other to be together at exactly the right time He chose. It’s so amazing how God sets the day, time, and place where the two people He created to be together, BE together.
I am so blessed to have J and to get so much love from people; Koreans. From the day of my flight, to every single day I spent there, ‘til I get back in the Philippines, I felt love, care and importance. I thank God for every beautiful experience I have, have had and will have.
God said, I will show you things you can never imagine and bless you abundantly, - He means it! He does what He says He will so hold on to His promises!

Glory to God!

love and discrimination

Last night I had a very long conversation with 5 Korean women of different ages. ( 22, 24, 26, 51, and ?). We talked about so many things and I really think that it was a very open, intellectual and sincere talk. What were the topics? Of course-the ever favorite of women, L-O-V-E, men, marriage, employment and stuff. I was actually in the hot seat because I'm the one who came here in Korea to meet "my future" mother-in-law.

Last Thursday was the first time to meet J's mom personally. Although I know that she doesn't approve our plans for marriage yet, she treated me well. She cooked my favorite food (camjatang) , she prapared my room, gave me towels and underwear coz she said I'll be staying here for several days, (but i brought many undergarments too! ^^) she gave me medicines for cold, flu and stomachache just in case, since the weather is still a bit cold for me ( 10 degrees in the morning and evening, but 30 at noon). She treated me as if I were her daughter in law. I felt love, warmth and concern and from her. J and I were so happy and hopeful that she'd allow us to get married soon. Bur this is what she said, " why does RayAnne have to be a Filipino? if she is Korean you can get married tomorrow". I'm not a mother but I understand her pain seeing her eldest son marry a foreigner someday which will surely be a straight way to discrimination. Her mother even got a phonecall from her aunt saying words of discouragement and all.

Anyway, I was happy to be talking with open-minded women last night. It's a relief knowing there still are people who believe in true love. It's nice to know that some Koreans are now open to other cultures.

Sigh. I am NOT worried of our future. I know that someday I will walk down the aisle and he's there at the front waiting for me. I JUST feel so bad that J now gets criticisms for choosing me.

I believe that God created one person who is exactly right for you. I know that J is the one for me. I know that he is the one I prayed for.

back in Korea

I got up at 3:30 today coz the sun was already high. It felt like 6AM! I wanted to sleep more but I couldn't. J and his mom attended dawn prayer and when they got back , J sneeked into my room, greeted me a good morning and touched my cheek. It's been a long while! I missed that. He's in the kitchen now doing his daily devotion while his mom is cooking breakfast. I am here writing. It's nice to be here! I love the modernity and beauty of Korea! :D I love the people too! I am so blessed to have met very good Koreans.

Yesterday during the plain ride, I met one couple who went to the Philippines for their honeymoon. We spent the whole trip talking and though I was having a terrible headache, due to the many cases of turbulance, I enjoyed every bit of our conversation. At the immigration, I thought I will be interrogated a lot, apparently, not a single question was asked. Isn't that great? hehe!

Today, I'll go to another province to meet my pastor and the rest of the congregation! I'm so happy about everything right now except for my camera that's been busted. Sigh!

an empty conversation

I was talking to a sister in Christ several minutes ago and I have to admit that I didn't like the conversation we had. I felt like she was teaching me something vague or empty. I don't know. I don't really want to judge her way of speaking the word of God because I also know that this is the part of my braggy system. This is me being judgemental and proud. This is me feeling like I know better than she does.

I can barely recall now the whole conversation coz it was plainly ambigous so I kind of forget them. What annoyed me actually is the use of highly beautiful words and deep Tagalog as if I am listening to someone born in the Old testament yet, the meaning was not clearly depicted.

I am sorry. I know that God is not happy with me right now writing about this complaint towards a sister-in-Christ. What I really want to say is that some people act and talk as if they know everything. Oh, I'd better stop right here. :D

I miss mom

Lord, I surrender. I want to move out. I am not becoming a better person. I don’t want to be like her someday. I am afraid that when I start my own family, I will be like her. I don’t want that to happen. I am devastated right now because I know that you gave me this task and I know that I can’t change my mom but I can always pray but…I am so tired. My heart is becoming like a stone and I am going farther from her. I have no peace of mind and I can’t believe that my mom has changed way worse than before. It breaks my heart and it kills me.
I miss mom and how she was like.

DIRTY ( part II)

My biggest burden as a Christian is my mom. I am not proud to say this but it’s true. I cannot keep up with the Word from the Bible " honor your father and mother" because every single day I find things that I really can’t stand and I just really want to escape or disappear sometimes. When I decided to work homebased, I knew this would be my problem. However, I told myself, I would like to serve my parents and give them the best that I can before I get married (although it’s not too soon).

I’m always awaken by my mom’s voice scolding my dad or my brother, or if not she’s complaining about other things or if it’s a quiet mode, that means she’s still asleep. I hate it!!! It drives me crazy. This is what I go through every single day and it makes me a crank too! I complain inside my mind when my mom is always out because it means I have to do all the errands if I want a clean house but I also have work to do! Ano ba?! Besides, I’m not the mother! I also complain inside when she’s here running errands because I am a hundred percent sure that while she’s here, she’s also holding grudges about doing everything here at home which is not true.

Today, she left early in the morning to do something at the church. She’s back at 1pm, already whining, because she can’t carry the feeds she bought for our small store, and that my sister is bugging her about the confirmation coz she’s needs it, and that she still needs to clean the house ( which I already DID!!! Hindi ba obvious?!) while our " maglalaba" came today washing the white clothes that have've been soaked for 2 days. And what is my mom doing now? - cooking something for some small gathering at the church which means she is going out again.

Somebody help me!!! I really HATE this part of my life. I am not talking but one day I am going to explode. Today, I washed all the dishes, mopped the floor, cleaned the house, cooked food and yet my mom said, I have so many things to do and I am the only doing it. I am so tired. What?! Did mom hear herself? Well, I shouldn't wonder. It's the same line I hear every day.

I do these things almost every day but she doesn’t see it. Why am wondering now?! Sigh.

ARE MOMS REALLY LIKE THIS? I DON’T WANT TO BE LIKE THIS. I want to balance everything, church, family, friends and etc….

DIRTY!!!

how would you feel if you wake one morning and the house is such a mess; the kitchen sink is full of dirty dishes, the floor is unswept, there's no cooked rice, the laundry has been soaked for 2 days, and your mother is at the church which leaves the store she manages unattended yet open and this happens almost everyday...

I'm not a whiner

1 Corinthians 10:10 - And do not grumble, as some of them did—and were killed by the destroying angel.

I’m not a whiner. There are times when I would comment on something that’s not properly done, but it doesn’t make me a whiner. Unfortunately, staying here at home ( because I am working home based ) makes me complain A LOT inside my head. I just hate the way my mom and dad and my brother do their stuff undesirably. I just can’t tolerate their ways and even if I want to shut my mouth, my head keeps on spinning and it makes me lose my sanity sometimes.

I hate the way my mom cooks in the kitchen and leaves every mess afterwards.
I hate the fact that she doesn’t stock groceries and goes to the market every single day.
I hate that she is almost everday out in the church (because she has SO many obligations) or with friends which leaves her responsibilities at home hanging.
I hate that she thinks she’s the only one doing all the chores here at home when it is sooo false.
I hate that she thinks she knows everything and she wants to outwit every person around and she doesn’t accept other people’s opinion. (Sigh)
I hate that when she goes out to buy something, she always takes too long because she gets stuck talking with people. (Well, not necessarily gossiping)
I hate that the house isn’t always clean because she’s always preoccupied.
I hate that she doesn’t know how to run our business well but she thinks it’s the other way around. (Whew!)
I hate that my brother is such a lazy pig and acts like a king.
I hate that he doesn’t value every single penny we spend for his education.
I hate that he doesn’t know any household chores, even cooking noodles or frying egg!!! (Gosh!)
I hate that he doesn’t listen and accept criticisms.
I hate that my dad is very kind but disorganized.


The Bible clearly says that complaining is a sin. It shows an attitude that you are ungrateful and bitter. Altright. I know that we can't change people and I can't act like a dictator by telling me to do this and that. But...their ways are killing me. So now, I'm just tuned in to my favorite songs, trying to calm my spirit. ^^

Glory to God!~

The Best things in Life

The Best things in Life (for me)

1. Falling in love
2. Family
3. Real friends
4. Laughing til your stomach hurts
5. Eating without worrying about gaining another pound
6. Sleeping without any worries and knowing you have at least 7 hrs to sleep
7. Hot coffee with pandesal and cheese
8. Picnic
9. Getting a snail mail
10. Receiving a comment or message from a long lost friend
11. Getting a lot of freebies
12. Getting a last piece of dress that’s 75% off and fits you right!
13. Food! Cakes, ice cream, pizza, barbecue, fried chicken, pasta, hamburgers, cheese, bread
14. Massage
15. Road trip
16. Waking up with the person you love lying right beside you
17. Breakfast in bed
18. Giggling
19. Good conversation
20. Phone calls and text messages
21. Cool roommates
22. Late night strolls
23. Sweet dreams
24. Sitting quietly in the park
25. Holding hands
26. Watching movies in theatre
27. Going to places
28. Meeting new people
29. Christmas and no work holidays with pay
30. Listening to old songs
31. High school life
32. Cancelled classes due to typhoons
33. Hugging the person you love
34. Tender kiss
35. Knowing the person you love, loves you back big time
36. Getting what you want after a long wait
37. Cuddling
38. Hearing the person you love the most tell you " I've been praying and waiting for you and I want to spend the rest of my life with you"
39. Internet
40. Meeting new people

There's a lot more but I'm sleepy now so I'll continue this tomorrow...hehe

Blessings Arise

Thank God it's Tuesday!

It's a nice Tuesday because I finally got my internet connection back and I can go back to work tomorrow. Also, I got a great job offer to work abroad. Apparently, I'm not sure if I can take it or not. Anyways, I'll cross the bridge when I get there.

Around this time, last year, I had an offer to study Theology in Korea and be a missionary at the same time. I was torn between leaving Philippines for greener pasture and staying in the Philippines with the person I hope to marry someday. Well, I'm not a fan of long distance relationships so I decided to stay. I know that long distance relationship is way hard. I saw my sister cried every single night back then and I didn't want that to happen to me. They even broke up, though they're getting married in July after 10 long years. Love is love, indeed. Anyway, even if I chose my boyfriend over a missionary work in Korea, God still blessed me in a very great way. I got a job as a Training Manager in another International English Academy and I also had the rare chance to be the private tutor of the Korean Consulate here in Philippines as my part-time job in the evening. Me??? A manager and a tutor to the Consul? I never thought of that even in my dreams. I don't have a Masteral. I never took TOELF, or TESOL or anything related to that. I didn't have any edge to have an opportunity like that. BUT...I've got the best backup- GOD! Aren't those blessings so great?

Next month, I'll be going back to Korea to meet my future in laws. This is really it! I'm getting married soon! ^^ Also, I might work abroad, depends on me whether I will accept it or not. I can't thank God enough. I'm so blessed, indeed.

God does bless His people even if we don't deserve it. He's just so good! so good!

Blessings everyone! May we all be blessed!

Glory to God!